It's Been a Minute...

Like, you know, almost a year. But it's fine. 

About a month ago, I joined Weight Watchers because I've been working out with friends after school 1-4 times a week since January, but I hadn't quite gotten the eating part down. I wasn't losing any weight and I needed something to hold me accountable. Quite a few of my friends had joined and I saw them getting results, so I pulled the trigger. 

I am so glad I did.

Joining WW has really made me think differently about food. It makes me think about healthy options vs just calories. It makes me think about feeding my body the proper nutrition it needs instead of just feeding it to feel less hungry. 

Now, I still enjoy myself every once in a while, but I truly enjoy following the guidelines and I am losing weight. So far, I have lost about 8 pounds, and I'm really proud of that. I feel so much better too. I'm more energized and ready to take on new things. I feel more confident.

But I'll be honest, this week hasn't been the best. Now, granted, it has been much better than the way I was eating before, but since joining WW, it has been the worst week eating wise. I feel a little guilty, but nothing like the guilt I used to feel. Today I've been on track and that's how I start every day after not being on track the day before. I want a lifestyle change, not a diet. I don't want to be restricted, I just want to live my life 80% healthy and 20% free to eat what I want. 

If you are struggling with finding a way to make a lifestyle change, I highly suggest joining Weight Watchers. This has been the happiest I've been while losing weight. It's the only thing that has worked for me, and believe me, I have tried a lot of different "lifestyle" changes. 

Starting Over

Sucks, doesn't it? It's a pain in the butt to start something once you have stopped doing it. So why do we stop? Excuses mostly. We get busy, we're tired, we don't want to, etc. The list goes on and on. I am one who definitely makes excuses when it comes to working out and eating healthy. I really can't tell you why other than I can be lazy when it comes to living a healthy lifestyle. I'll get going on it, I'll feel so good, and then I fall off the wagon and can't bring myself to get back on. 

Maybe it's because I haven't learned to live life in a balanced way yet, hence the title of my blog. I used to feel so guilty about eating a treat, like I didn't deserve it or something or a treat didn't have room in a healthy lifestyle. But that's not true; I don't want to be restricted from the foods I love, but I also don't need to have them every day either. 

According to the scale, I have lost about 5 pounds since school got out. I've definitely noticed I'm not as hungry so I've been eating less. Yesterday, my boyfriend and I started working out together. Little by little I want to make healthier choices that I can sustain and live with long term. It's a process, and not an easy one, but it's something I'm slowly working on. 

I'm tired of excuses, of letting life get in the way, I'm tired of not being the happiest and healthiest person I can be. I also miss running. I felt so good about myself when I ran every day. But I think I overdid it and now my knee hurts whenever I run. I'm not sure if there's something I can do to help with that, or if I just have to be careful and not run every day. Any runners have any suggestions? :) 

Two Thousand Eighteen

I am really excited for this year! I honestly have no idea why, but I just have a gut feeling this year will be amazing. I just feel like my goals are going to be accomplished, and I'm ready to put in the work to make them happen! 

Now, I'm not the type of person to say "new year, new me." I don't want a "new" me; I just want a better version of the me I was before. There's just something about a fresh start that gets me excited. However, all my goals I want to accomplish, I've already started working on in 2017; I'm just continuing what I've already started in the new year. 

However, I fully believe life is what you make of it. Now, that doesn't mean life can't throw you curve balls, because it certainly can, but how you react to those can make all the difference. If you want something, go for it. If you want to change something, then change it. If you can't, then change how you react to something. Change your attitude. Basically, life is up to you and how you want to live it. What are you going to do to make 2018 better than last year? 

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I hope that whatever this year brings you is nothing but good things. I hope that whatever you go after, you get. I hope you get all the good things this life has to offer. 

One Little Word for 2018

I recently found out about the One Little Word Project. Words are powerful, and one little word can determine how your entire year goes. I have decided to pick one little word for myself for 2018. But before I tell you what my word is for the coming year, I need to reflect on 2017. 

Even though I didn't pick a word for 2017, as I look back and reflect on how the year went, I think the word that best describes my year would be change. I was so unhappy with my life. My job really affected everything else in my life; it was all consuming. I hated my job, hated myself because I thought I'd made a mistake with my career (I did not), and I hated who I had become. I wasn't motivated to workout and eat healthy and I was stressed all the time, which in turn made me hate my body. 

But then I made a change. I found a new job, I moved to a new town, and I have made a new life. I love my school, I love my job, and I'm happy. I am truly happy with my decision to move, and I am so thankful to the people in my life who have supported me along the way! 

This quote has been my motivation this year. I am a better person and teacher because of this quote. 

Now on to 2018.... The word I have chosen for the new year is discipline. Discipline in my job, at my house, with my fitness goals, and anywhere else it can apply. I am the queen of procrastination, yet I love the feeling of being productive and getting ahead. How does that even make sense? I couldn't tell you, to be honest. 

When looking up words, I came across this quote, and it really made me think about my life and about how I wanted this year to go. 

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I first thought about my fitness goals: getting a workout in because it needs to be done. I need to do it for my mental health. I need to do it for my physical health. And I need to do it for my goals.

Next, I thought about my work. I need to grade those papers so they don't pile up. I need to plan lessons ahead of time and get prepared. I need to keep finding ways to engage my students. And I need to take time to reflect and be better next time. 

Lastly, I thought about my home, and the daily/weekly chores that I need to be better at keeping up with. I need to vacuum and clean weekly. I need to do my laundry weekly. I need to make my bed daily.

Some days I may not want to do any or all of these things, but when it comes down to it, I need to do all of these things in order to live the way I truly want to. Discipline is something I have always struggled with, but I really want to make it a priority this year and master it. 

I can apply discipline to my life and do what needs to be done. [Only teachers will understand this ;) ]

If you choose a little word for 2018, comment down below what it is! I'd love to have people who will hold me accountable! 

I hope you have enjoyed the holidays with your loved ones! I know I have. 

Accountability Part 2

It's hard, right? Holding yourself accountable? Life is constantly changing, and staying on track for your goals is hard. I mean, especially when there's wine, pizza, and dessert readily available for consumption. #amiright #holidayseason

But in all seriousness, staying on track with living a healthy lifestyle is real hard. As they say, if it was easy, everyone would be doing it. Who is "they" anyway? 

My point: I've been trying. I've went to the gym at 5:45am twice this week (shout out to Jill and Dan for inviting me and keeping me accountable) and I went to Refit yesterday. Three days in a row I've exercised, and it's been a long time since I've been able to stay that. And I feel good. Like, really good. I'm proud of myself. 

This healthy living lifestyle has been a series of ups and downs. I can't seem to find a way to make it work long term, and maybe I never will, but I will keep trying. I'm already looking forward to my workout tomorrow, so that's something to push myself to work towards. 

My advice to you is the following: find someone who can hold you accountable and who you can also hold accountable. Work together and help each other, even if it's just a text inviting each other to the gym or making sure the other one goes if you're not on the same schedule. My friend Jill does that for me, and this week it's really motivated me and sparked a new motivation inside me. I'm grateful for that. 

My next move is to come up with a plan. A plan that I can live with, that works for my schedule, and that will help me stick with it. I've really been enjoying going to the gym early in the morning. It helps kick start my day and helps me start the day in a great mood! I'm loving it. And then after that I can just go home and be lazy for the rest of the night knowing I've already exercised for the day. 

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Up next: clean up my diet. But, that may have to wait for after the holidays ;) 

In It to Win It... Or Not

Teachers should get another week to recover from Thanksgiving Break. Four whole, beautiful days off and I am dragging this week. I feel so unmotivated, in everything. #helpme 

Grades are due this week, and if there's one thing I do not enjoy, it's grading. It's time consuming and redundant. It's important; gathering data drives instruction and helps close gaps in learning, but dang do I hate the process of gathering it! 

This week has just been meh. I feel meh, I feel like I look meh, and just meh. I wish I could stay in bed for a week and sleep through it all. I'm hoping to get my good mood back soon. My students definitely help. The sweet notes, the hugs, the smiles. They can heal a broken heart, that's for sure. 

Being a teacher is hard, really hard. Some days I want to scream, cry, and rip my hair out. I answer a million questions a day (not exaggerating), I try to teach kids to be kind to each other, and I also teach them how to solve two step story problems with equations and unknowns represented as a letter. Some days my head hurts so bad because of how many decisions I've made throughout the day that I just go home and sit on the couch and decompress. 

Being a teacher is even harder if your personal life isn't going well because you have to constantly be on point all day long, even if you want to burst into tears like I have this week. 

But, being a teacher is rewarding. Being someone your students love unconditionally is such a good feeling. Being adored is something I wouldn't trade for the world. 

Being a teacher is hard, but damn is it worth it in the end. 

Thanksgiving Break

Oh my goodness I am so thankful for my four day break starting the day after tomorrow. I. Am. A. Tired. Teacher. I'm ready for a break and so are my kids. 

However, I have loved hearing the stories my students have told me about where they are going for Thanksgiving and what family and friends they are seeing during the holiday. It makes me happy to know they will be loved and happy while they are gone from school. 

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I am looking forward to Thanksgiving. A time to be with my family and revel in all the things I have to be thankful for. And dang am I ready for a break from work. But, let's be real, I'll be grading over the weekend. #lifeofateacher 

Happy Thanksgiving!